After writing the year-in-review blog post, I thought about my kids’ year, asking myself, “What did I do to stimulate and encourage their growth?” And “how did they grow?”
Disclaimer: Now, you should all know, that this is NOT in a mom-guilt perspective. If all you do is center your life around your kids, then you should have a million answers to this question. And then stop to appreciate your awesomeness. Yes. Stop. Pat yourself on the back. Because I know you want to continue on to list off all the things you think you DIDN’T do. Don’t go there. Just celebrate.
But for me, I have a million and one interests, so sometimes my kids get lost in between my work calls, lecture preparation, daydreamy thoughts, and hobbies. So from my betamomma perspective, I thought I would reflect on my kids’ growth and on what I hope we can do together next year. I hope you can have fun with this, too!
A stronger core:
Travel was the theme for this year, but I knew that in order for my middle kid would have a time with all the walking. Ever since she was a baby, her core was always weak. But her deficits were always so mild that it never affected school, or even her activities. A school evaluation found that she didn’t meet criteria to need physical therapy at school. Finally, I took her for an outside physical therapy evaluation. They noticed her weaknesses and every Wednesday morning before school, she worked for an hour to strengthen her core and got special shoe inserts to help with her ankle position when walking. After two months, we paused services to travel, and what a difference it made. Walking through the night markets of Chiayi, from Luxembourg to the Eiffel Tower, and through many castle tours in England, she was able to keep up pace without much complaining. I’m so glad I followed my mom instincts to get her evaluated and so proud of my middle kid for persevering!
A runner after my heart:
Running is one of my favorite activities and I was thrilled that my oldest kid started to enjoy running. It’s a healthy thing we can do together. And it is even a time we can work on her anxiety. Running slower, or going an unexpected route, or running less than she planned to, can be very uncomfortable for her – even to the point of tears. Running through those challenges allowed her to learn how to deal with other challenges in life. She learned how to deal with an imperfect run or an imperfect time, which is helping her learn to deal with the imperfect human life. When she gets frustrated, we try out different calming and grounding strategies. Most of the runs, however, are lighthearted and we get to enjoy nature together and talk about the days’ highlights. And I am so happy to watch her improve her times and emotional health through running.
Potty training delays:
Back to travel, I postponed potty training the youngest kid because it was easier to change her diaper than to reliably find a bathroom. Plus, she had no interest in potty training, so why push it. Initially, I second guessed my decision since Taiwan had clean bathrooms everywhere – public parks, grocery stores, and even the local train stations. But on our second trip of the summer, I was glad that she was still in diapers because Paris was still very lacking in this amenity. When we came home in August, I was determined to potty train her. And she was determined to … not pee in the potty. After a few cycles of trying with no-diaper days and pausing on the training, she got the hang of it and was an expert with very few accidents. I’m relieved that this phase is finally behind us, and am enjoying local trips with much less bulky, diaper-less purses.
So in summary, between my three kids, this year they got stronger in their core, in the brain, and in the bladder. All the travel we did this summer also seems to have strengthened an interest in foreign languages. Another accomplishment the older two have now is learning another language through Duolingo. The oldest one is learning French in school, but is interested in learning Chinese on the app. The middle one is learning French on the app, probably because older sister is learning it in school.
For the next year, I hope that I can learn French with them, so that we can practice our conversations together, and maybe visit Montreal. I hope that we can be more active together. I also hope to do more hymn nights where we sing around the piano – the oldest and I taking turns to play. I wanted to put more money into my kids’ activities, instead of a gym membership for my husband and I (I’m pretty good at working out on my own with running and popsugar fitness videos on YouTube), so I’m excited that we a local basketball and volleyball league that fit our schedule. One for each of the older kids. I do also hope that we can go snorkeling. The middle one wanted to go snorkeling, though I have a feeling she has no idea what that really entails, but I’m researching some places for that.
What are you proud of your kids for this past year? What plans do you have to stimulate their growth next year?