Resentful. 

That is the word I was looking for. The last few weeks I had several conversations in which I struggled searching in my brain… “Begrudgingly”? Too clunky. “Regretfully”? Too formal. “Upset”? Too one-dimensional. Finally I remembered to check in thesaurus and found it. “Resentful”.

I’ve talked to so many people recently where it came up, and I can’t remember who they are, maybe it was you, so I’m positing it here.

I was trying to make the point that when I give – a reward, a gift, a compliment, my efforts, my time – I am never resentful if it is not returned or appreciated. I give from a place a joy, and I have so much abundant joy in me, that no one can steal my joy. Not the colleague who disrespected me (who is no longer a colleague). Not the friend scolds me over a tiny misunderstanding. Not my kid who tells me I’m the worst mom. Not the internet trolls who tell me I’m the worst mom. Not my husband who disagrees with me in front of the kids. Not my mom…. ehn… I’m still working on that one 😋. 

Almost nobody can steal my joy. So for example, if I offer to work, I’m never resentful of the people who are on vacation or of the person calling out for their own or a child’s illness. I’m so happy and grateful that I’m healthy and my kids are healthy that I can go to work. I’m so grateful I have a job to go to. I’m so grateful my kids have a safe place to be so I can work. I’m so grateful my kids have loving teachers and caregivers. I’m so grateful I have mom friends who could take my kids for the day if my own village couldn’t.

>>>>Here one and two things you can do to immediately have more joy<<<<

It’s not like I have a limited supply of joy, that if I give joy and I don’t get it back, then I’m missing joy. It’s more like a infinite supply. Love and kindness are free to give. It costs me nothing to be kind. Not even mental energy… I’m too busy in my brain thinking about my joyful things. I always try not to allow people to live rent free in my mind. What about boundaries? People taking advantage of my love and kindness?

Check back for part 2 in a few days. All about how I protect my joy and setting loving boundaries.

And if you are ready to have this kind of unlimited joy, if you are tired of people stealing your joy, sign up for the secret sauce to real life wins >>>>here<<<<. It’s free. It’s freeing. What are you waiting for?